Consequences of Domestic Violence for the Abuser and for Society

Consequences of Domestic Violence for the Abuser and for Society

Summary: This essay analyzes the consequences of domestic violence on the abuser and on society. The aggressor suffers emotional deterioration, escalation of violent behavior, and isolation, while society faces generational reproduction of abuse, reinforcement of gender stereotypes, and high economic costs. The text concludes that domestic violence is a structural problem that requires comprehensive intervention, justice, and restoration.

Domestic violence not only leaves deep scars on the victim and their family, but also transforms those who commit it and contaminates the social fabric. Although the focus is often placed exclusively on the harm done to the victims, which is absolutely necessary and urgent, it is also essential to analyze the consequences of violence on the abusers and on society as a whole. Understanding this broader impact allows us to see domestic violence not as a private matter, but as a collective phenomenon that demands a comprehensive response.

In this blog we address the psychological, behavioral, and social consequences that violence produces in the perpetrator, as well as the structural costs and damage it generates in the communities where it occurs.

Consequences for the abuser

The aggressor — whether male or female — rarely acts in a vacuum. Typically, they have grown up in violent environments, where they learned that power and control are achieved through physical or emotional domination. According to research by Dutton and Sonkin, many abusers were victims or witnesses of abuse during childhood, which can lead to cognitive distortions surrounding power, affection, and conflict [1]. Below are some of the most common consequences experienced by abusers:

• Normalization of violence as a tool for power. The abuser believes that respect and obedience are imposed through fear and punishment.
  
  
• Inability to resolve conflicts in a healthy way. They have not developed communication or emotional regulation skills, and resort directly to physical or verbal aggression.
  
  
• Escalation of violence. The absence of immediate consequences reinforces abusive behavior. The abuser rarely seeks help unless there is legal or social intervention.
  
  
• Repeated contact with the judicial or police system. Although reports may create a temporary pause, without therapeutic intervention, the pattern continues.
  
  
• Emotional exhaustion and psychological deterioration. The abuser may experience frustration, impulsiveness, feelings of emptiness, or emotional dependency, that intensifies the cycle of violence [2].
  
  
• Damaged self-esteem. Their sense of losing control and dependence on violence as their only resource creates an internal image of emotional incompetence.

Consequences for Society

Domestic violence does not stay within four walls. Its impact spans generations, institutions, public resources, and community cohesion. Some of its most evident social consequences include:

• Intergenerational reproduction of violence. Sons and daughters who grow up in a violent home are highly likely to become either abusers or victims in adulthood [3].
  
  
• Reinforcement of gender stereotypes. Society perpetuates the false idea that men must be dominant and women submissive, consolidating harmful patriarchal structures [4].
  
  
• Reduced family quality of life. The emotional and physical health of those involved is seriously affected, and households become unsafe spaces.
  
  
• Increase in crime and overload of the justice system. Cases of domestic violence contribute to statistics of urban violence, femicides, and criminal activity.
  
  
• High economic costs. Expenses related to hospitalization, psychological treatment, legal procedures, shelters, and rehabilitation programs represent a significant burden on governments [5].
  
  
• Erosion of social trust. The normalization of abuse undermines communities’ capacity to live in peace, justice, and solidarity.

Domestic violence leaves both visible and invisible scars not only on victims, but also on those who commit the abuse and on the society that tolerates or ignores it. When the home — which should be a place of protection — becomes a training ground for future abusers, the damage transcends generations. Prevention and support must include not only victims, but also abusers who need emotional re-education and accountability. As a society, we can no longer consider violence a private matter; it is a collective wound that demands urgent and shared healing.

References:

[1] Dutton, Donald G., and Daniel J. Sonkin. Intimate Violence: Contemporary Treatment Innovations. New York: The Haworth Press, 2003.

[2] Bancroft, Lundy. Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men. New York: Berkley Books, 2002.

[3] Margolin, Gayla, and Elana B. Gordis. “The Effects of Family and Community Violence on Children.” Annual Review of Psychology 51 (2000): 445–479.

[4] Connell, R. W. Gender and Power: Society, the Person, and Sexual Politics. Stanford University Press, 1987.

[5] World Health Organization. Global and Regional Estimates of Violence Agains